Subway: A Method to Their Cheesy Madness

A while back I made a cartoon about Subway’s goofy way of arranging cheese on their sandwiches, and I learned something after posting it up on the site: people are very passionate about cheese. I’ve gotten more commentary on that comic than any other so far.

I recently got an email from a guy named Stu, who said this:

I love your subway cartoon, I work at subway and printed your toon. The staff found it funny, my boss did not!!!

Next day a notice was put up about cheese! And I took a photo to send to you.

Here’s the photo he attached:

simple brilliance

It seems there’s some devious reasoning behind Subway’s practices! They choose to offend geometric decency to make their customers pay more to fill in the missing puzzle pieces! That’s evil genius. Stu also gave me this caveat:

Remember that all subway stores are franchised owned so every store will be run in its own way, and this notice is only from my subway.

And he’s right, so we can’t make the same statement about all Subway locations, but this is the best explanation I’ve seen for why cheese placement might be an important part of a business model. Who knew?

Thanks, Stu.

-Drew

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187 Responses to “Subway: A Method to Their Cheesy Madness”

  1. Calvin says:

    I for one, welcome our new Subway Cheese Overlords.

    • zap says:

      Wow, did you come up with that all by yourself?

      • Obvious says:

        In Soviet Russia, Cheese Overlaps You!

        In North Korea, Overlapped Cheese in Only For Old People.

        Now Rolland Fuckpaille just needs to copy paste the article onto his spamlog and write lol at the end of it, and have that written into an xckd comic, posted to reddit, and the reddit dugg, and then slashdot to pick up on it 4 months later with successive duplicate articles. At which point a Sub Sandwich LolCat is produced, along with a motivational poster about how to arrange cheese to piss people off on the internets, then mention apple in some context. Microsoft will then buy a smaller sub franchise, and replace their aging unix based POS terminals with microsoft POS, which will fail, so Microsoft will heavily subsized the industry, buying up exclusivity contracts with condiment suppliers, while funding a small coffee upstart to sue starbucks for violating their cup property rights.

        Microsoft will then charge people to look at the crap post modern ironic artwork on the walls of their shitty sub shops, with their exclusive condiments and fillings, and as you walk out of the door someone wearing a DRM tshirt hits you on the head so you loose all recent memory of what you saw, and your stomach is pumped so you can repurchase your food.

        SO that is why you shouldn't buy Xbox's, because you are funding global terrorism, Ron Paul FTW!

        best comment EVAR.

      • tinby says:

        A better name for subway would be skimpys. Subway sucks.

    • dddddd says:

      Good job. Have a cookie.

    • Hammer says:

      "Cheese"? I dont think this substance qualfies as cheese.

    • Cheese Rules says:

      I love cheese. But anyways, great cartoon – I guess they don't want to use more cheese, because doing it the way they do currently means they only have to use like 2 or 3 triangles to cover a foot long, whereas they'd need like 4-6 for full coverage.

  2. Peter says:

    I knew it. I can't stop looking at the cheese arrangement when I get a sub now because of that comic. Damn socialists.

  3. Mr. Viking says:

    Wow. You're officially famous now!

  4. Mark says:

    "A life worth living" now has a $0.40 tax. Preposterous.

  5. Tim says:

    That's so devious.

    You can take my money, but you can never take my cheese preference! (Or my freedom!?)

  6. MennoW says:

    omg awesome ^___^ we dont even have a subway around -_-'

    If i ever come across one, ill try to make them put my cheese in a filling way, without paying extra ^__^

    _O_

  7. Jerry Kindall says:

    This would be devious if they didn't overlap the cheese triangles.

  8. retsoksirhc says:

    It…it's all so clear now.

  9. marshall says:

    Not a problem in Southern PA… where the Subway franchises I visit have workers who consistently give me double cheese without my asking for it and without charging me! :-)

  10. Winter says:

    Wow. It doesn't work, for me at least. I just wonder why they do it that way.

    To be honest, i don't actually really WANT more cheese. What they put on there is just right. I wouldn't mind if they arranged it properly though.

    (Maybe that's the whole plan–it isn't that you need more cheese, it's just that you have to buy MORE in order to get proper arrangement! "Have it our way", perhaps?)

  11. liberamentem says:

    Me thinks your comic probably spurred the Subway owner into thinking about the extra $0.40 business model.

    I too noticed the curious arrangement of cheese, but shrugged it off as a convenient (and fast) way to handle the triangle shaped cheese slice stacks.

  12. drew says:

    Italian BMT /wrap/, Double Meat, Double Cheese, No Sweetcorn, Light on the Jalapenos, Mayonnaise and Chilli sauce

    • Mr. Viking says:

      Am I missing something? Do you really have to ask for no corn on your sub? Do people put corn on their subs?

      toasted?

      Do they toast wraps? They should.

      This whole ordeal is blowing my mind.

      I hope you guys get the digg effect though. I've increased my project wonderful max bid.

    • Che Guevara says:

      see drew you could easy out through all justin blog rights if you taked about cheese!!1 HOLY shit 80 + comments that like the record for the site, bet yas are happy that you changed sever a while back, i dout the old one would cope!

      lol well kudos to you drew for orginally creating the subway cheese comic!!!!

  13. Quest says:

    This technique clearly worked on me, because I'd often ask for a bit more when they were putting the cheese on. However, I accidentally turned the tables on them by failing to use the magic phrase "extra cheese", so they'd always forget to charge me extra when we made it to the till!

  14. flingcom says:

    Charged for double cheese? Glad my friends work at subway it's *all* free :D

  15. Kit says:

    I have worked in a Subway for two years [part time] in Australia, and until I saw the comic I followed the overlapping triangle style of cheesing subs.

    My store doesn't flog extras at all, and we still overlap the triangles. But I have broken with this age honoured tradition and now take the time to tessellate the cheese.

    [Which IMO is way too much fucking effort for $8.30 AUD an hour]

    There is no appreciation for the different style, just questions. I get asked, "Why did you do the cheese like that?" and get told that, "They don't do the cheese like that in Alice [Springs]".

    It hurts.

  16. Infophobic says:

    Way to go! Chase the long tail!

  17. Stefano says:

    cheese triagles are the very reason I never eat at that freakish place. I need squares. Lots of them, piled high. For $4 I can make my own sandwich. sink the subway for all i care.

    Oh yea, and the fresh baked bread? Tastes like store bought. These guys know nothing about sandwhiches.

    May 'Nicks Feed Your face' rest in peace. only through there all too brief presence on earth will I have ever known the true presence of greatness in a sandwhich.

  18. The detail that went into your managers note clearly shows he/she is insane.

  19. Capthook says:

    Mmmmm…. Subway. 2 Slices of meat, and a slice 'o cheese. Corporate downsizing meets sandwich making! um, Yay!

  20. Z-Man says:

    Dangit.

    Now I'm hungry for a substandard sub.

  21. For most customers, cheese tessellation increases the ratio of preparation time to perceived deliciousness of the sandwich. In addition, the rapid wrist rotation involved in the tessellation can contribute to the development of carpal tunnel syndrome. Although the preparation of the sandwich isn't geometrically sound, it comes out ahead in overall cost-benefit analysis.

  22. Che Guevara says:

    wow that is fuck genius!!!!!

    who would of known!

  23. Jason S says:

    Nevermind that you're paying $7 for for a bread, meat and cheese sandwich.

  24. GarbageDonkey says:

    Subways can be (and for the most part are) very very evil. It's really up to the owners of the store though. Some of them are nice, some of them are clearly penny pinchers (bastards) as pictured above. Working at Subway for 4 years, we always would put our cheese in opposite directions, every other slice, to make a full layer of cheese… It just LOOKS better that way!

    I say that you simply start asking for you cheese that way, no, demand it that way from now on. They'll get the idea after a while, and with any luck they'll already know what to do when you walk through the doors ;)

    • Nelson Rockefeller says:

      My biggest thrill (outside of oral sex from my assistant who didn't know any life-saving techniques) was rubbing Musterole on my nostrils and then chopping onions for three hours.

      Cumquats is a dirty word.

  25. Razor says:

    As if the arrangement of the slices is bad enough,last year they took provolone and swiss off the menu at subway reducing the choices to american,pepperjack and mozzarella!!!!! Now they limit us to 3 types of cheese AND arrange them like the greedy bastards they are to encourage people to waste money…..damned disgraceful. I bet thats why the Taliban attacked us…no swiss or provolone cheese in subways all over the world and we pay extra for american cheese that should be FREE!!!!!!! We are americans after all where is the patriotism??????

  26. Jason says:

    I worked for Subway for 3 hours. I quit during the initial "training" by the manager who had a similar plan related to olives, whgihc are apparently the most expensive item on the sandwhiches, per pound. We were instructed to put only two olive slices on a regular size sandwhich. If someone asked for extra olives we were ordered to put just two more olive slices on. If the kept asking for more, just two each time they asked. I pictured this huge Harley dude walking in with an "I love Olives" shirt on and eventually pummeling me to death.

    Along with the black polyester pants, the whole thing depressed me so much I just walked out.

    • frappe987 says:

      Kudos to you my friend, kudos to you!

    • Hlarm says:

      I LOVE olives!

    • GarbageDonkey says:

      Thank goodness the store I worked at, though tried to keep the olive usage down, certainly made sandwiches that were "normal" by most standards. In other words, we took all that "minimum" bullshit and tossed it out the window. It's good that you walked out, stores like that feel more like leaches than a friendly welcome environment.

  27. Arkz says:

    wait you get pepperjack i want pepperjack…

    • Che Guevara says:

      lol we get old english, normal and swiss in australia!!! and even still they took pineapple of the menu!

  28. Martin says:

    Everything Subway does is tested and researched at its corporate owned stores before it is handed down to the independent franchises. If Subway is arranging the cheese this way, that's because their research tells them so. Also, undoubtedly, there is some cost savings behind doing it this way or they wouldn't be doing it. Almost everything Subway does is about maximizing profit. For instance, the reason they bake their own bread isn't because they care. It turned out that they made more profit (five cents a loaf) vs buying from a bakery (twenty five cent a loaf). Subway is smart because they are more in the business of selling their franchises than their sandwiches.

  29. This whole thing is rather cheesy.

    Why would anyone who works at Subway actually follow these damn cheesy cheese placement rules?

    And why do some customers actually like those triangles the way they are? That's a more important question.

  30. Mookie says:

    All cheese aside, I have experienced similar absurdity from Subway locations regarding other ingredients:

    At a Rochester NY Subway, there was NO lettuce on my sandwich order that I called in, because I didn't specifically ask for it, even though I said "all veggies". Turns out, there was a lettuce shortage, or just general lettuce hatred in Rochester, as I had similar problems getting my rabbit food from other restaurants.

    At a Portland OR Subway, I watched in amazement as the person building my sandwich was *counting* the little rings of olive as she placed them on my sandwich. No, she didn't have an OCD, she told me that it was "Subway Policy" to on only put 6 (!) pieces of olive per sandwich, but I could have twice as many for another 35 cents.

    So, indeed, there is a lot of variation in practices among Subway franchaisees (sp?).

    I sincerely hope I have thoroughly bored at least one person with this comment.

    • Che Guevara says:

      nope…. sorry, i can act it if you would like!

    • dweezle says:

      Unfortunatly there can be variation among Subways. However there is a standard ingrediant policy that is all stores. For a footlong – you should get 2.5oz lettuce, 6 tomatoes, 6 green peppers, 6 cucumbers, 6 olives, 6 pepperchinnis, 6 jalapenos, and 1.5oz onions. (A six inch is half of that and a Mini is half of a six inch. Salads are the same formula as a footlong.) For the store to make a profit the employees are supposed to stick to this formula and believe me the profit per week is not very much when you look at big chains like Burger King and McDonalds.

      As for the cheese selections it actually depends on the territory that the store is in. For instance Washington State on the west side has 2 diff territories. North and South. It is up to each territories own board to detemine what is best for there area. My stores carried pepperjack, chedder, american, and shredded montery chedder. Subway corperate tells us that you have to offer the above list except for the chedder. That last spot filled in with papperjack was the territories decision. This is also why some stores will carry seafood sensation or pastrami and some will not. In my store I allowed employees to place the cheese in whatever way was fastest. I also do not charge for double cheese and only charge for triple cheese. Its just one way I can give good customer service. We do however charge for extra olives, pepperchinnis, bacon, and double meat.

      I am saddened by all of this negative talk about Subway. It can be very healthy food and as for charging extra it is how the stores can stay in buisness. They can ony make a profit if the food cost is low and the productivity is high as with any food buisness. Would you own a buisness that didnt make a profit? Hope this sheds some light on the subject. And yes I know my spelling and punctuation is bad. (Im doing this one handed while holding the baby and theres no spell check :))

    • Mary says:

      YOU ARE A GENIUS.

      i work at subway in PA.. i put whatever the hell i want on the sandwich and don't charge people for extras even when i'm supposed to… um oops?

  31. Leo says:

    Those bloody bastards!…I knew it!

  32. silly says:

    never again will I order extra cheese, i feel violated

  33. Duane says:

    My brother actually owns several Subways, and I sent him the original comic. So it please me no end to think of him writing up just such a sign and sticking it in all of his stores. Even better, maybe Stu works for him :).

  34. Eater says:

    I always get extra cheese anyway, because no matter how they place it on the bread, the "normal" portion just doesn't cut it.

    Their psycholistical tricks can't ruin my lunch!

  35. Bethy says:

    What about the people with OCD who need to fill in those extra spaces?

  36. Patrick Burt says:

    This is perfect!

    Step 1: Arrange cheese in a specific way

    Step 2: Get people to buy cheese

    Step 3: Profit!

  37. Josh says:

    The Subway my wife used to work at offered double cheese for free, but they didn't really tell anybody about it. They just didn't charge when it was asked for.

    So, not all Subways are evil. Some are just sneaky.

  38. Miller says:

    As a former Subway employee, I found this to be funny.

    At our restaurant, our bosses encouraged us to arrange the cheese in a "geometric" way. In other words, the entire bread was covered with cheese, no slices had overlapping corners.

    The Arab-owned Subway I now eat at for lunch sometimes arranges the cheese with overlapping corners. Annoying. >:(

  39. Cheeseman says:

    I always order extra cheese at Subway and rarely get charged for it. The person who makes the sandwich and puts the extra cheese on usually forgets to tell the cashier. Its a Subway hack.

  40. Mr.mysteriou$ says:

    I never trusted subway anyways… Honest!

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  42. Stirling says:

    Extra cheese is priced at a whopping $0.00 here so no worries about them trying to get extra money out of our town.

  43. Alex says:

    you are truly a comedic genius

  44. David Greiman says:

    It seems I have to go to a mom and pop sub shop to get a decent sandwich these days. Corporate subs are sad.

  45. Max says:

    Haha, I recognize that 100th comic of yours. . . under your "Doodles" on your old site, eh, Drew?

  46. […] [WoW!] Gigantor Holes all Around The World [LoL!] Evolution of Fashion [WTF] Subway is Trying to Jack You Few Slices of Cheese @ a Time! […]

  47. Tim says:

    Looks like a few spambots got in here… And I don't just mean all the people using this like a forum. I mean actual bots. There are several in here.

    It would be cool to have an actual forum for this where we can submit our own art and stuff.

  48. John says:

    I work (on breaks because of college) at a Subway as well (Mine in Southwestern PA). We offer American, Provolone, Pepper Jack and Chedder cheese, which is REQUIRED by our region.

    Anyhow, when I make sandwiches I always overlap the triangles, not because of any malevolent will, but because it's far faster to do and looks good as well. Heck, I even do it on my own. My advice? Just ASK for it to be made that way. I've made some weird-arse subs for people before (turkey and tuna anyone?), we'll basically do anything you ask for. Remember that the customer is always right, and if you put up enough of a fuss, they'll do it over losing you as a customer.

    Additionally, I recommend that you have them spread your meat over two halves. This was recommended to me by a customer who asked for a BMT with the ham on the other half (me "what?"), but once I tried it for myself later, I found that the taste was immensely improved. For sandwiches with a lot of meat like the BMT and the Club, moving the ham to the opposite side of the bun, sandwiching the veggies in the middle, it spreads the taste out.

    As for veggie amounts, our region doesn't charge extra for more veggies, you simply have to ask. I'll make you a pickle sandwich if you ask for it (I've done it before), but I generally follow the recommended amounts unless someone asks for a different amount.

    I'm really saddened to see all the Subway hate here. While the corporation may be an evil corporate empire, the individual shops pull surprisingly little money, between OUTRAGEOUS corporate fees and ludicrous supply costs.

    Oh, and I add double cheese and absolutely forget to charge for it more often than I do. It's a safe bet that this happens often.